well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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