ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
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