it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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