What a fucking waste of an outfit
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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