haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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