i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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