For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Randomize
