I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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