it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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