i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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