either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
