no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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