It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
