Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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