Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.