Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
