hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
