Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize