I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
