that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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