You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Dear god my vagina.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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