Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Randomize
