P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
This house was built for laser tag.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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