I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize