You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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