Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
What changed your mind?
Being sober
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I can feel your judgement through the phone
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
