found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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