how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Alive.
So much puke
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize