You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
