Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I lost the right to judge tonight
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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