He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
FUCK WHALES
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
