Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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