OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
