plz talk dirty to me
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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