I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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