Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
