She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
