Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize