the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
