i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
this boner is exhausting
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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