I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
