so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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