Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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