it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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