So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Randomize