He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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