I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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