if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
