the condom got lost in my hair
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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