Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
